The following article appeared in today’s issue of my school newspaper. Please read the letter for...

Fri, 27 Jan 2012 08:30:00 -0500

The following article appeared in today’s issue of my school newspaper. Please read the letter for yourself — it’s short. If you are as outraged as I am, please consider commenting on it here. As you can see, the author of this piece proceeds to blame women and the way they choose to dress for men’s continual disrespect and misogynistic actions. It is a women’s fault that he can’t “look at [chicas webcam] without disrespecting [them] with his eyes.” PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE TO EDUCATE THIS MISGUIDED FELLOW. Not only is going to be a college graduate in the near future, he holds a position of authority on our campus as a resident assistant — a position meant to nurture and shape young men into upstanding human beings.

BY BRENDAN RHATICANContributor

Dear women,

You may respond by saying that men cannot speak on women’s clothing, but I assure you that it has become as much an issue for me as it is for you. I’m asking that you wear more clothes. It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to look at you as a woman. I want to tell you that the less you wear, the more of an object you become, and the muyzorras more conservatively you dress, the more of a woman you are. You may reply: “What, then, are you asking for? Do you want me to veil myself as the ancients did? Can I not be presentable? Do you want me to just stay inside?”

There are still men who cherish a chaste woman before a “presentable” woman, a virgin before a diva and a commitment before instant gratification. A woman used to be honored for her virginity; now she hates herself for it. A woman’s chastity used to be her attractiveness, her security, her character and her virginity, her beauty. You ask why men are no longer chivalrous. When was the last time your actions demanded chivalry? You ask why you are treated like an object. Why wouldn’t you be objectified?

It is increasingly difficult for me to look at you without disrespecting you with my eyes. What else do you want me to think of when you wear skin-tight clothing? You have stripped yourself of everything that made you beautiful. You have offered yourself to many men and wonder why I do not treat you like the only woman in the world. You chose the “bad boy” and wonder why you never have any “luck” with real men. You make men into animals and ask why they cannot tame their appetite. You feel empowered when you live with no strings attached and ask why you are so lonely.

I want to look at you and not at your body. I want to talk to you without having to play a flirting game. I want to make marriage the ends of our relationship and not a future contingency. I want to desire you for your virtue, not your body. I want to love your character, not your mask. There are still some real men. You do not see them because your actions do not demand them.

Can you sacrifice fashion in order for me to treat you like a real woman?

WOW FUCK YOU. definitely responding to this.

responded with this:

Dear Brendan,

You may respond by saying that men can speak on women’s clothing, but I assure you that it has not become nearly as much an issue for you as it has for us. For example, are you frightened that you will be raped and lose the case against your rapist because your clothing was proven too skimpy for you not to have “had it coming”? I’m asking that you use more resources than your own self-absorbed “expertise” when making such public and outlandish statements as this one. It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to look at you as decent human being. I want to tell you that the more you publicize this archaic point of view, the more of an imbecile you prove yourself to be. You may reply: “What, then, are you asking for? Do you not enjoy listening to me spout off my completely uneducated, ill-informed point of view? Can I not speak my mind, no matter how triggering and shaming it may be to women who have been assaulted and/or raped? Do you want me to truly consider all the implications of that which I am offering as truth before I go off on a misognynistic rampage of women’s rights?”

Though there are still men who cherish a chaste woman before a “presentable” woman, you have no right to choose which of those incredibly stereotyped and generalized roles a woman chooses for herself. All woman are not honored for their virginity and not all women hate themselves for it- you are speaking of something you know nothing about. A woman’s chastity was never her attractiveness; it was her SELLING POINT, emphasis on SELLING. I ask you, why do you think we care at all about the death of chivalry when as a concept, it is still alive and kicking in all of the unfortunate ways it always was? Chivalry is nothing but a clawing for power: “I will put you on a pedestal, but once you’re up there, you must do as I say and wear what I say and have sex with me whenever I want it! “ When was the last time someone treated you like an object based on your clothing? What outfit could you even imagine being used as an excuse to come into your space, rape you, and violate your most basic human rights?

Your lack of self of control does not negate my right to wear whatever I like, in whatever fashion I would like to wear it. Your complete lack of regard for women’s rights does not mean that they do not exist. Your lack of acknowledgment that women are people, just like you, that deserve to be treated with respect no matter what they look like or wear, just as men deserve to be treated with respect no matter what they look like or wear, is a shameful reflection on you as a person and the society who created you.

Could you sacrifice your idiotic notions of chivalry in order to treat all people, including women, the way you would like to be treated?

It’s like me saying that men should stop growing beards and wearing cutoff shorts, because I won’t be able to resist wanting to have sex with them. Whether or not I sexually assault them is ENTIRELY up to me. So while I can appreciate the beauty of beards and cutoffs, I never treat people wearing them as brainless sex objects or invade their personal space by harassing them.

If you want to engage in conversation with someone without flirting, don’t flirt! Clothing has nothing to do with it

About me

Fri, 27 Jan 2012 08:28:46 -0500

i’m victoria sélavy, eighteen years old

anarcho-humanist, feminist, lover of life.

The abyss also gazes

The following article appeared in today’s issue of my school newspaper. Please read the letter for...

About me